Sunday, January 16, 2011

That one time I witnessed a MURDER!!

Our apartment doesn't allow pets, except for fish. So, we have this sexy beta fish that we named Rufus, so we could talk about him and pretend he's a dog. We love Rufus. He swims around, jumps and tries to bite our fingers when we feed him, and he really likes watching TV. The new RM's love Rufus too, they enjoy witnessing and exploiting his predatory nature


One of them, went and bought a little goldfish, and brought it over to feed to Rufus. Mostly, the two fish swam around in circles for an hour with Rufus nipping off some of the little fishes fins. Once the RM left, we sprang into  action.  We saved the little goldfish and were keeping him safe in a separate cup, safe from the terror he was witnessing previously. Alas, poor little goldfish wouldn't be safe for long.


Some other guys that live on our floor, decided to come pay us a visit. We told them how we had valiantly saved the poor little goldfish from a horrible fate and expected them to commend us on our bravery. Here's where the murder comes in. I had turned my back to take something out of the oven while the guys were looking at the little fishy. When I turned back, I saw one of them (I'll call him Lucius because he's EVIL!) pick up the goldfish, and....
(pausing for effect)......
..................................
DROP THE LIVE GOLDFISH INTO HIS MOUTH!!!!!!!!! 
That's right ladies and gentleman, Lucius ATE MY GOLDFISH!!!! Just swallowed the poor little guy whole! I was so shocked, I nearly fainted. 


So, for future reference, don't keep men and goldfish in your apartment at the same time. NO GOOD WILL COME OF IT!!!!


Ambrosially yours,

paprika

2 comments:

  1. That's almost as bad as last year when my boyfriends roommate bought 2 beta fish, to see if they really did fight. Let's just say they're called siamese fighting fish for a reason... I don't think we ever did get the dead fish smell fully out of that apartment.

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  2. Haha! Luckily the death of our fish was relatively mess free! What is it with guys and aquatic violence??
    -Paprika

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